Friday, February 4, 2011

A Day Of Rest

I have worked on my writing every day this week.  This was the week I was able to get some daycare for my son to make time just for me.  I am happy to say, I didn't waste it.  However, now it's Friday, which for most people involves an evening of relaxation.  For me, Friday is my get-it-done night, the night my kids normally go to their dad's house for a sleepover.  My husband normally comes home from work, scoops up the babes, and together they run out to grab some carry-out.  He entertains the baby while I work on my writing, never looking up until I'm done. 

This week, I worked really hard and accomplished a lot.  I edited five or six chapters of my book and came up with the perfect ending, which I set in concrete in my mind but haven't written a word of just yet.  Now that I have the ending in mind, I am ready to write it and then weave the other chapters together.  I have several more first and second drafts of chapters to edit and a few more to write.  I still have a ton of work to do.

I desperately want to make use of the quiet time I have coming to me this evening, but I am absolutely exhausted. 

My toddler loved his new Montessori school.  He came home singing, "Pop, pop the weasel," and told me about his music class that they do just before the parents come to pick up the morning kids - brilliant, really.  His impression of school is that the whole day was wonderful because music class is the last thing he remembered after forgetting all the tears in the morning. 

The stress of daycare, no matter how great it is, has definitely affected my little man.  He has effectively boycotted sleep this week.  The night before the first day of school, he was up until after 11:00 p.m., excitedly talking about school buses and numbers.  The next night, when I returned from writing class, I heard his voice when I walked through the door at 10:00 p.m.  He talked non-stop, so excited and nervous.  I tried to quiet him, but he said, "Mommy, I missed you.  I want to talk."  And so we did until he eventually settled down.  Last night, we had more of the same.  I am amazed he woke up early and resisted his nap today.

I am confident the school is very good, having gone through a long string of adequate daycare centers and one bad one over the years with my other kids.  The effort to get him to sleep and worrying about whether he will ever sleep again is taking its toll on me for sure.  I am feeling very fidgety and nervous today.

I don't want to take a day off from writing today, but I think that's what I need.  When I was working out in the world, I definitely wouldn't have put my hands on anything important, something I could ruin, on a day when I was not up for it.  Maybe the best thing I can do tonight is put in some laundry, clean up the house, and rest up.  Hopefully I can make time for that last chapter tomorrow.

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