Help

I remember seeing a show once on TV when reality shows just started, like during season two of Survivor.  But the show wasn't Survivor and I don't remember the name.  It was a show like Celebrity Rehab where the people all had mental issues, not necessarily chemical dependencies, and weren't celebrities at all.  The show was pretty pathetic, sad, and lame, but one episode spoke to me.

The woman was a cancer survivor and had other issues (I can't remember what but assume it has something to do with being non-assertive).  Before she could go home, she had to do a little challenge.  She had to fill up a tub of water one bucket at a time in a set amount of time.  She could accept help if people offered.  She carried the heavy bucket of water to the tub, one bucket at a time.  You could see her frustration and that the buckets were heavy - after all she wasn't physically strong after just having cancer treatment.  One at a time, people came to her and offered to carry a bucket for her.  She gladly accepted the help.  Each person came with their own bucket, buckets full of holes that were leaking the water and wasting the limited time she had to fill the tub.  One after the next, people came and offered help with their leaky buckets, each bucket with larger holes than the last until she finally realized that kind of help wasn't helping her.  Eventually, she politely said, "No, thank you," to each person that offered and with strong determination filled the tub herself with plenty of time to spare. 

The moral of the stroy is that not all help is help you need.  Sometimes even if you aren't feeling well, it takes less energy to just clean the house, take care of the baby, and do the dishes by yourself.